Wyoming Soccer Referees

Casper, Cheyenne and Rock Springs all have upcoming classes.

Parenting is hard. You’re busy. Let 50 other parents do the yelling for you. What tiger-mom or wolf-dad would lure their kid into oftentimes esteem-destroying youth soccer officiating? Easy: Many parents who have also officiated and thought it did them a world of good. What do they know about how time spent “on-the-flag” or “on-the-whistle” prepares youth to face the world that awaits? Literally speaking: Your kid would have a big leg up on a traffic control highway gig with the Department of Transportation. They’d certainly be able to hit this question out of the park: “Have you ever held a flag while people shot you dirty looks?” Their response: “More than you know, pal.” Seriously: How can these experiences positively shape your teen without you even having to play the heavy? Let’s review how your most often-pleaded and ignored phrases can be heard and heeded by your teen without you having to be the repeating party. Further, let’s cover how youth soccer officiating can be part job, part soft skills development and a big part parenting-by-committee. So, hit the concessions; grab a bag of stale popcorn; pull up a lawn chair, and; let’s dive in. But first, a big disclaimer: I’m NOT advocating for Coaches or spectators to rain abuse down on Officials. We’re doing all that we can as Officials and Administrators to halt that toxic culture. Having said that, there will always be passion and, hopefully, to some lesser extent: dissent and expressions of disappointment in sport by someone at the pitch. It’s a reality in sport. Learning if and/or how to best address it is a critically important skill. It is this adversity that can sharpen the skills of an Official to handle criticism…both on the pitch and off. 1. “I’m not mad at you, I’m just mad” There’s an exposed feeling of making a wrong or sometimes right, but simply unpopular call. Stir in and stir up dozens of passionate parents, a few competitive coaches, and pleading players and that nobody-likes-me feeling can droop even the most confident teen posture. Your youth official will hear EVERY “you’ve got to be kidding me Ref?!?!” lobbed in from the lawn-chair-arm-chair sideline (“touchline” to be more exact for your young official, btw ). It’s oftentimes internalized, soul-crushingly processed, rationalized and hopefully compartmentalized while they’re chasing the next play to remain the under-appreciated overseer of fairness. Simultaneously, they’re attempting to tick through an unending mental checklist: “How much time is left in the match? Are there subs waiting to come in on the next stoppage of play? Are my Assistant Referees (AR’s) trying to get my attention? Did I restart the clock after the last injury? Is that Coach shouting ‘C’mon Ref!’ or ‘C’mon Red!’? What’s next if there’s a tie in regulation time?” Log a few dozen matches and an official is able to literally take it in stride, assuming they stick with it. For those that do, the first time a stressed boss comes unglued during a staff meeting, the battle-tested Referee inside of your youth will be better equipped to be able to remain composed. A co-worker seated nearby will likely muse to others, “That’s good parenting right there.” Maybe not, but a fella can dream.